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My parents took this opportunity to take their dream "around the world" trip. They had saved up for this trip for a long time. And since I would be home to mind the house, they could leave and not worry. I was old enough to take care of myself, and I have been since I was twelve. I had always been very mature for my age, and my parents were fortunate for that. They just left last night, and now my dream was going to come true, I was going to experience womanhood, for at least one year. I had been taking female hormones which I had obtained from a med student that I paid highly, for about four months now, so I had started to act, feel, and look more feminine, but since my parents were always around, they didn't really notice the change in me. I had also let my hair grow from the time that I had started taking the hormones. Again my parents didn't really care since they just thought that it was the latest fashion for guys my age. I even went to the extent of. It’s worth it, though, because sometimes, in some small way, I succeed. When I can watch a woman’s face change from tears to smiles, I feel like a god. You certainly know how I feel when you cry, because I love you. That misunderstanding with your friend that upset you so much — I told you how I felt about that. I was prepared to walk to the ocean and swim across it, just to try to make your problem go away, just to fix things, just to dry your tears. You cried last night because I had shared my upset about my situation with someone else before I shared it with you, the one I love. That made me so sad that I nearly cried with you. I hope you realize now how guilty I felt, and how it broke my heart. Here I was again in my dream, making you cry. In my dream, I told you I needed to hold you, and you said you wanted that, but that we couldn’t do it until the coffee was gone. You were crying, and I was desperate. I had to do something. I had to fix it. So I did the only thing I could.
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